I'm beginning to think that I am incapable of ever being happy in a relationship. I will always find something wrong with someone or find something to cry about.
Even when things are smooth I find a wrinkle or find a way to make a wrinkle.
Every relationship I have been in (ok it is only 3) has made me cry uncontrollably for no reason.
I wish there were some way to just be happy with someone. I want to believe that there is one person out there that I am meant to be with and that person is my soul mate, but that seems really unlikely.
There are endess possibilities and endless people I can meet and put up with, I guess.
I happen to be fixated on this one guy right now and I can't figure out why he seems to just have so much power over me.
It is as if he knows I get bored easily and he's figured out ways to keep me entertained by creating drama for me.
posted by Idalmis @ 6:34 AM
2 Comments:
your entry makes me think of this song lyric "when nothing seems certain or safe, let it burn through you." that always comforts me.
whatever you go through, it's part of life and it's another experience, so just take it for what it is, and flow along with where life takes you..
all we can hope to do is learn, and live as fully as we can in the moment.
Glad to see you are blogging again.
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